I did this last year and swore I'd make icons every month of 2025, but...well, having a 6 month long depressive episode really puts a damper on that. But instead of giving up entirely, I wanna do a progression of what I did make!


( click through for a year's worth of icons! )

I have, and his name is Mayoi Ayase *w* Which is to say, the next event is not MaM, and is instead ALKALOID!!! AND MAYOI IS THE CENTER FOR IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


I just knew he was gonna be the center for the fanthanx, I knew it! I feel so validated ;D
ALSO JUST. HELLO. GOD HE'S SO GORGEOUS EVEN WHEN HE'S WEARING THE MOST QUESTIONABLE OF THE FANTHANX OUTFITS SO FAR. ALL OF THE FANTHANX OUTFITS HAVE BEEN INCREDIBLE; WHY MUST ALKALOID GET A WORSE VERSION OF THE TRICKSTAR ONES??????? IT'S NOT FAIIIRRRRRRRRRRRR!!!! Me and the homies (friends in a discord chat) were crashing out last night because Mayoi is just so beautiful and we couldn't wait for the song to drop. Like, how dare they reveal the event and then make us wait 3 hours for the MV???? It dropped at 4 am my time, which is inconvenient when your wife has to work at 8:30 am.

....we totally didn't mean to stay up for it but oops we did anyway and holy shit it was worth it. The plaid outfits are (mostly) redeemed; the song is so fucking good that it made everything better!!!!! And the outfits honestly look better in motion, so there's that.

Anyway, in my defense, they did use possibly the most boring frame of the whole MV as the thumbnail, so what was I supposed to think?


like look at this shit!!! they're all just standing very still, despite 99% of the MV being incredibly dynamic :T
My other main gripe is that this isn't very Valentines, you know? 'Cause this is running in the usual time slot for that...I guess the Megasphere finale could be our Valentines event, but it's doubtful, especially since the holiday campaign is starting this week.

bluhhhhh

Though apparently Mayoi's first center event ran in this exact time slot despite being sky pirates, so???? What do I fucking know XD I should really stop trying to predict what the hell they're gonna do, because half the time they just do whatever the hell they want.

oh god right---

Speaking of Mayoi events, I cannot fucking believe he's overlapping with an ENG event where he's a 5* but he sure is!!! The Plum Blossoms event also starts on the 31st, though I guess the JP event starts about 12 hours earlier because of time zones. BUT STILL. Plus Blossoms was the first ever event I played in JP and I got two copies of the Mayoi from it, so he kept me company in green songs for the first year or so I played. So I was planning on maxing him in ENG, because I love him, but now his fanthanx is here. sobs.

plz let the SCR of his fanthanx outfit be bad. plz. I can't afford to max two different events at the same time I'll die

I'm determined to get Mayoi in the first 24 hours tho, so I'm probably gonna just stay up all night playing. Maybe gonna hop in the voice chat in the one of the enstars servers I'm in and stream me playing (probably badly esp once it's like 6 am lmao) so I have some company. idk. I'm just excited!!!

OH LOL SO ANYWAY. One of the enstars discord servers I'm in started as the chat for anyone interested in tiering in War Atop the Sugoroku Board event, but as since just turned into a small, chill chat. It's got some people who produce different units than other chats we're in, which means Liz and I finally have someone to talk about Eden with ♥


I did impulse tier in that event, but tiering in Last Mission was 100% on purpose and I'm still so glad I did ;w; Double Face forever!!!! also lol 67 *shot*
.....okay this entry is long enough, I gotta stop because I've kinda run out of things to rant about properly, you know? And Pat is currently trying to dig the car out enough that we can go to Home Depot, since our shovel is actively falling apart while he's using it.

You know what a foot of snow needs? Photoshoot in your backyard featuring a skirt you made in 2017 and then promptly forgot about!!! Pat very kindly braved the cold to bring my ~vision~ to life.


the skirt is so warm and the shirt was a poor life choice XD


I like to think I'm cute and funny, and I'm right~
At least now I know what I'm wearing to the ren faire this year ;D I made this skirt to wear to a vampire ball that Liz and I went to as part of our anniversary trip, and then just...never wore it again???? idk man, it looks good actually so I have no idea why I never found another use for it. Definitely wearing it in like, 9 months, when it's ren faire season. I've also just been wearing the skirt around the house because it's floor length, so it's keeping the warmth in. So yes, I'm wandering around with a black lace train like I'm living in the Addams Family, I guess XD

ANYWAY.

I did manage to make a few icons, so that's cool. I don't necessarily love them, but part of that is just...getting back into it...thankfully it's only been like 6 months so I'm not as rusty as I could be, but I still wish I could stay more on top of things and/or skip this stage.

And then the enstars event announcement is tonight and I'm sooooooo fucking anxious, since it's either gonna be MaM or ALKALOID, so my money is gone either way. If it's MaM, no one's gonna hear from me for a week while I grind out 22 mil points. sobs. It's just like.....some of my fave units have ended up last in the rotation and also why couldn't Madara have his event while I had a job and therefore more money to blow on a phone game? Like of course he waited until I had less disposable income. Bitch.

idk I don't have anything else to say, since I've been in the house all weekend. At least the snow is really pretty and we've had a fairly chill time just vibing. Trying to focus on the positives, you know?

I've been snowed in for 4 days in a row, 2 being days I was supposed to work. But I can't go to work when there's ice on the road. I'm absolutely not complaining that the storm hasn't been hectic for me. The power has stayed on, the temperature is cold but I've just worn multiple pairs of shirts/socks indoors and sleep with 2-3 blankets. I did have to stomach a "Cuban style" (lol) shower and washed my hair in cold water this morning, but it surprisingly became slightly warm and bearable.

My paycheck drops tomorrow, and I'm very likely going to work. My household needs to get groceries. When I go back to work, I'm probably going to request my schedule for the next 2 weeks be rearranged, since I missed half of this week's and I'm worried about my paycheck. Fingers are crossed that I'll get hazard pay, but I doubt it!!!

My website is also back online under a new url.

https://capyhaus.neocities.org/

Hopefully I will get back to "long form" or "high effort" forms of creativity than doomscrolling and venting. The last 2 years have been just, really really bad. Ideally I should have Capy stickers printed by TFF in March.

I also want to bring my Ivy shrine back, but redo it. I think I'm going to have to go for an iframe if/when I make a new layout. I really didn't want to do this, but I have so much canon info and official art I want to store :( But I'll cross that bridge when it happens.

purged:
sugarcookie
tantalizes

deleted:
tech

IT'S A WINTER WONDERLAND!!!!"
So it snowed basically all night and most of today before switching to freezing rain, which is decidedly less good but like. Whatever. It's still very wintery, and I like that...even if I'm not going out in it. It's way too damn cold!!!! Even after taping up a bunch of the windows in the house, we're all bundled up cuz the heat is only doing so well.

Other than that, I'm baking some cookies and debating trying to make icons again, since it's been...months.........all my photoshop skills have been going to ensemblerefs because that's less creative, I guess? It takes less brain thinking skills, at least.

I also wanna try to write something for threesentenceficathon cuz it's one of my favorite yearly events...I'm just still fighting Mental Illness, you know?

also trying to get back in the habit of updating this and I'm like "how the fuck did I write such long entries????" I think I spent a lot of time rambling about enstars, so I guess...that's it XD

I mean I am upset about Hiyori fucking me over in the gacha, since there's a 50/50 chance that the next jp event is gonna be MaM (though the other option is ALKALOID so I guess I'm kinda screwed either way) and I need the rate up if it's Mama. I'm not saving up another 120+ memorial coins like I had to for Halloween Madara last year :T I'm just gonna max him during the event!!!!

..........also also I've made a lot of nui outfits in the past 6 months, so when I'm up to it I kinda wanna post them here. Dreamwidth is just such a better way to organize and hold onto things than everywhere else ;w;

So... I'm very close to my rebrand. I'm iced in, missed work today, and there's been no power outages in my county. I'm thankful I'm in the privileged end of this storm, but despite having so much free time and freedom, I just can't focus to have fun or do my "work". It's really frustrating me. Even when I was a NEET during my early-mid 20s I had this problem even on high dosages of Wellbutrin. I was more productive when I was unemployed in 2024 because I was in a relationship... go figure. Now my brain is just a cheap dopamine-seeking ping pong ball.

I'm chipping at my first rune of 2026, and it goes from humorous to sad. I shouldn't get into how my only relationship fucked me up, but I'm just... distraught how I wasted the last 7 years of my life on a lie. But I shouldn't write about that on a public "entertainment/portfolio" website. So I'm just cutting this melodramatic bullshit.